Sometimes, the needs of a client can change dramatically between sessions. Not so long ago, a client who had been coming about once a month as part of a plan for staying healthy had a devastating loss. Prior to this appointment they had been confident and clear about what they needed.
Now they were in need of nurturing and holding in both an emotional and physical sense. I found myself changing from using oils for aching muscles (lots of gardening) to those for an aching heart. Jasmine with it’s richness and depth along with the lighter Rose. I added Bergamot for it’s uplifting freshness and Rosemary for it’s role in remembrance.
The massage changed also. A little less work on the legs, longer on the upper back around the heart and lung area. Longer on the stomach and a lot more on the hands. Also a lot longer, just holding the head at the end.
When I think about this session and subsequent ones during the grief process I know that while both I and the client think that this was really important and helpful, it would not have been right for everyone. The grief process is unique to each individual and there is no right or wrong way to go through it.
I have a personal view that support from others is always helpful but the way that support is given has to be right for person going through the process. Some would not find the physical contact that this client needed helpful. Some would find my choice of oils didn’t suit them.
Working with this particular client who has now found their confidence again, there is an additional emotional depth to our work and an acknowledgement of how closely the physical and psychological selves are linked that wasn’t there before.